One thing that keeps troubling me is that I can’t seem to make friends. It is a fact that erodes my life time after time. Well, I don’t know what is my life is better with a friend or without one. As far as I remembered, apart from dogs.., I have very few friends. Most of people I know sicken me
Made me wanted to throw up. A friend of mine thinks that seeing a psychologist might cure me. And of course I never did. It is a waste of my time, telling a stranger about my personal problems.
Maybe one problem I have is I don’t trust human, for I was fooled by so many times by my beloved mother and everyone I trusted. No more trust to anyone again.
Another fact that I am living alone is that I have a high sense of privacy, the world of my own. I enjoyed reading hours and hours without seeing others.
Plus standing at the present, I have greater responsibilities, which I have to rely on myself completely. Therefore, letting other stirring my consciousness is prohibited.
Moreover, I never allowed myself to fall in love, I am too rational to do such things. I often think, love, and judge with my head, and feel with my instinct. But nothing to do with my heart as I am ‘heartless’.
